Bachelorette contestants preview.....

Let's first get a few things straight here. I am not an Ashley fan. I think she is super WHINE-y, she's not a dentist, and she doesn't know what she is doing or what she wants. Soo, that combined with I don't have TV, I probably am not going to be watching this anyway. But they posted the guys on FB, and I couldn't help myself. Also, I have a problem with thier "occupations". Example: they listed her as a "Dentist". She's not. She hasn't even started school. Hell, I started ultrasound school, so, I'm an ultrasound tech. It's that easy! Ha! Stupid Stupid. Half of these guys are dumb ass things too. Annnnnd, as a blanket statement, I'm just going to say here, Boys, button up your freaking shirts and do't wear necklaces. You look like idiots.

Ames. 30. Banker.

Average. Works at the drive-thru for the local Credit Union? Aim a little higher, Ames. Possible Little Man Syndrome.

Anthony. 28. Butcher.

Hate the chest hair. Hate the necklace. Looks like a tired tom-cat. Butcher???

Ben C. 28. Lawyer.

Ok, #1, he doesn't look like he is looking for a woman, if you know what I mean. I hate when they have 1+ contestants with the same name and they add the last initial. Makes it a little less personal. "Oh, I love you Ben C!? "Oh, contestant #422, your shirt is pink!" Wonder if he is a lawyer, really.

Ben F. 28. Wine Maker/Internet Advertising

HAHHHAAAA - don't! Anyone can make wine, he isn't getting paid for it! Idiot! Internet advertising could be porn for all we know. Looks ruffled and insecure. Bad hair.

Bentley. 28. Investment Banker

I'm going easy because I think he is cute. Minus the lumberjack shirt. And that one fluff of hair on top.

Blake. 27. Denstist

Kind of cute. Button up your shirt. Are you a dentist?

Chris D. 25. Sports Marketing Coordinator

I can't pinpoint it here - just an overall wierdness. High-schoolish? What would a sports marketing coordinator do? Coordinate sports marketing, I guess. I don't know what that means? Put up fliers when there is a baseball game? Throw T-shirts into the crowd at the Jazz game?

Chris M. 27. Construction Owner

Can you say BACKSTREET BOYS???? What the hell is that jacket? You don't own anything buddy. Wow.

Constantine. 30. Restaurant Owner

Hate his name. Glad his shirt is done up. Neck up = car wreck.

Frank. 29. Director of Admissions for an Art College

WOOOAAHH, freaky eyes. Or should I say 'eye'!!? Think his shirt is undone from the top AND bottom.... Eww, can't look him in the face, it's intense. And what the hell is he doing for a living?

Jeff. 35. Wine Owner

Double WOOOAAAHH. Red flags are popping up all over the place here. Freaky eyes. V-neck. Necklace. WINE OWNER? My hell, my mother in law owns wine to cook with, that doesn't mean a damn thing!! He is going to kill someone someday, if he hasn't already. How the hell old is Ashley? Some guys are 25, he is 35. What. The. Hell.

Jon. 26. E-Commerce Executive

Please, for the love, button up your pink shirt. That's all I have on him, other than his occupation sounds semi-legit.

J.P. 33. Construction Managment

Face looks realllly old. Construction worker in New York?? Hmm, doesn't sound really appealing. Looks like a guy who makes pizza and has mobsters in his family.

Lucas. 30. Oilfield Equipment Distributor

First of all he is probably out of work since we have no functionig oil rigs going on in the U.S. (thank you Obama). He looks Mormon.

Matt. 28. Office Supply Salesman

Wierd patch of eyebrow before his real eyebrow, but cute other than that. Just a few little plucks will take care of that. Shirt is stupid. Works at Staples? Hmm...

Michael. 28. Business Development

"Business Development" says to me "I tried to start a business and it didn't work and I am just kind of sitting here now". He looks like a cowboy with that scanty facial hair.

Mickey. 31. Chef

Spikes were out of style in 1999 Mick. Also has one creepy eye.

Nick. 26. Personal Trainer

This is classic "make me sick" type of guy. Tan, chest showing, goofy smile, satan patch of hair on chin, wavy long hair, PERSONAL TRAINER. Hate. Douchebag.

Rob. 27. Technology Executive

I could call Benj a "Technology Executive". Button up your shirt. Looks gay-ish.

Ryan M. 27. Construction Estimator

LOL, I could estimate your contstruction for you, it is going to cost a lot more than you thought or than you have. There, I too, am a "Constuction Estimator". Looks like a player.

Ryan P. 31. Solar Energy Executive

Looks old and Mormon. I have a solar energy flashlight, does that mean anything?

Stephen. 27. Hairstylist

More reg flags. Him and Ben C. should hook up and just walk off the set right now. Really? Really.

Tim. 35. Liquor Distributor

Holy hell. He looks like someone you'd see in a casino. Sooo....pretty much, he is a bartender? I hate his hair, his necklace, and his hair. Liquor Distibutor, huh?

West. 30. Lawyer

I can tell you right now he isn't a lawyer. He has little man syndrome. Are they serious with the blue-washed-out backdrop from 1988? Something is wrong with this guy.

William. 29. Sales Consultant

He looks mormonish too. "Sales Consultant" is so vague. I worked at Pioneer Party & Copy and was a 'sales consultant'. The kid selling shaved ice could be a 'sales consultant'.

So there you have it folks - the line up. Enjoy the season. Let me know what freaking happens!