So, real quick I have 2 cute stories:

First, Owen (nephew) thinks that him and Max talk to each other. The first time, the conversation went like this:

• Me: What is he saying Owen?
• Owen (listening to my belly): I think he said 'Christmas tree'!!
• Me: really, are you sure?
• Owen: Not quite, but I weally think he said 'Christmas tree'!

Then last night he was pretty sure he said 'couch'. Funny kids. Hope they will be good friends. Owen also went off the other day about teaching Max to play Sonic (on his xbox).... "I'll show him the bad guys, and how to free the little animals, and how to get coins, and how to run and jump and curl up then go weally weally fast. I pretty much know everything about Sonic." I bet he will attempt this 'teaching' soon after Max is born.

And second:

Benj and Max have a game they are playing and I don't even think either of them know. When we are in bed, Max will wake me up kicking. I wake up and realize that Max will kick and then Benj, dead asleep, will 'tap' back at him, and so on and so forth. They go back and forth, somehow communicating, for a few minutes. I started trying to talk to Benj and he really was fast asleep, had no idea he was probing my tummy in response to Max. Cute guys!

My sweet mother-in-law is taking me to get a pedicure right now - sooo excited!!! Thanks Tam!

I will post pics of the nursery as soon as the room is presentable..... He is sharing with the 'office' and we are poor as sheephearders, so don't get too excited. Benj has done a great job fixing furniture up and putting things together, it would be much worse without him!

Better

Max's room is black white and red vintage football - so in his honor, I changed (again) to this color scheme.

So I finally got calmed down enough to look for another background. I got it all changed and looked at it and it is so busy and bright it halfway gives me anxiety. We'll see how long it lasts.

So I had a sono yesterday, and here are the stats. His estimated weight is a whopping 5 pounds (a little on the big side for his age, of course, and looks nothing at all like the little floating baby posted on the right of this page). He has gigantic feet, chubby cheeks, and is still a boy (ultrasound tech said, 'look, here is his little turtle!"). I could see hair waving in the amniotic fluid. He was appparently sleeping and didn't want to be screwed around with. He was all curled in a ball and kept turning his head back and forth like he was irritated, had his arms in front of his face. Finally he moved his arms and yawned, as if to say "just take the damn picture and let me go back to sleep,". His personality is already one of a mini Benj = stubborn, which is great, I challenge him to mess with me.

I would also like to bring to your attention the two latest updated pet peeves to the right.

Thanks

PS, it has been brought to my attention that a few people would like to see a 'pregnant' picture. Well my answer is NO to that, just picture me as I was pre-preg, just fatter. It's nothing to get rawled up about.

Jicama (????)

Whatever the hell this is, is Max's appx size this week. About 3.5 pounds and kicking me square in the lung ever 5 minutes or so.

So it has been a while, I have pretty much felt like crap-o. We had a 'false alarm' thinking my water broke and ended up at the hospital last weekend. Everything seems to be ok now, just freaking really uncomfortable. I also ended up taking an iron supplement because my levels were low and making me dizzy. Whoever is familliar with an iron supplement, knows they 'back you up'. I have tried multiple things and am now one step away from an enema before I serioulsy die. I never thought I would utter that sentence.......

I did, however, pass my Certified Coding test and and now a proud Certified Coder; and not doing any coding at all. My job has completely changed and it kind of sucks. I am just trying to get thru the next month or so and then I can just focus on Max for a bit. At least I have the certification if I ever have time or motivation to find a coding job.

Anyway, my little 6 year old neice got a cell phone (long story, Deuche Bag dad...) and has been calling me all day just to shoot the breeze. Talking about movies and school, boys, etc. What has this world come to!? Whatever!

**Quick addendum: I just spent like seriously 3 minutes looking for a new background and ended up in tears because I can't find what I want. I'm going to freaking bed.

Ahh

I just remembered the cereal Waffle Crisp, and smiled.

a Chinese cabbage

28 weeks

Welcome 3rd Trimester!!!!!

Some things to look forward to:

• an EPIDURAL!!!
• a Rhogam shot
• Contractions
• less sleep
• Dr. visits every 2 weeks
• more weight gain....
• worse 'pubic bone' pain
• baby showers!!
• my wedding ring not fitting anymore...
• a hospital tour
• finding a pediatrician (any reccomendations?)
• finishing the nursery!

So I'm rounding the home stretch. Don't worry, I am ready to breastfeed with my left guy, even though I am not going to be breastfeeding. My freaking crotch and back hurt like crazy, but other than that, I'm ok. Got some cute 3D pictures of his little face this week....

kind of hard to see the first one..... really close up. Anyway, I am almost feeling so much movement that it is concerning. I know they say decreased movement is bad, but gee, it feels like he is having a seizure or panic attack sometimes..... I guess he just likes the Dr Pepper.

Some Random Thoughts

I think part of a best friend's job should be to immediately clear your computer history if you die.

Nothing sucks more than that moment during an argument when you realize you're wrong.

I totally take back all those times I didn't want to nap when I was younger.

There is great need for a sarcasm font.

How the hell are you supposed to fold a fitted sheet?

Was learning cursive really necessary?

Map Quest really needs to start their directions on #5. I'm pretty sure I know how to get out of my neighborhood.

Obituaries would be a lot more interesting if they told you how the person died.

I can't remember the last time I wasn't at least kind of tired.

You never know when it will strike, but there comes a moment at work when you know that you just aren't going to do anything productive for the rest of the day. This hits me about 8:30 every morning lately.

Can we all just agree to ignore whatever comes after Blue Ray? I don't want to have to restart my collection...again.

I'm always slightly terrified when I exit out of Word and it asks me if I want to save any changes to my ten-page research paper that I swear I did not make any changes to.

I hate leaving my house confident and looking good and then not seeing anyone of importance the entire day. What a waste.

I keep some people's phone numbers in my phone just so I know not to answer when they call.

My 4-year old son asked me in the car the other day "Dad what would happen if you ran over a ninja?" How the hell do I respond to that?

I think the freezer deserves a light as well..

I disagree with Kay Jewelers. I would bet on any given Friday or Saturday night more kisses begin with Miller Lites than Kay.

CRIB ARRIVED TODAY - PICS WILL BE UP SOON, BENJ IS PUTTING IT TOGETHER RIGHT NOW! MAX IS A HEAD OF CAULIFLOWER THIS WEEK!

English Hothouse Cucumber

Whatever that is, it looks freakishly long, is Max's appx size this week. Almost 2 pounds! 6 1/2 months today!

His 'movement' got a little intense the other day. I am pretty sure he was doing a 'scissor hold' on my bladder followed by a kung fu kick/backflip. (Which sounds exactly like something Benj would do if he could....) Almost peed myself. Startled me a little. I have a miserable cold and desperately want to take Ny-Quil and Ibuprofin :(

Let me also just mention: the 'turd' picture below....my good friend Cher thought that was my darling husband.

Benjamin Franklin and a 'turd' costume

So this Halloween/Daylight saving time season has brought to my attention yet another pet peeve or two of of mine.

Nothing worse than when you can't tell what the hell someone is dressed up as. Drives me freaking crazy. Half the time these people want you to ask and I don't even want to give them the satisfaction of that, I will just make fun of them instead. Here are a few examples:

My first guess here would be some sort of Star Trek something. The caption on the website said "turd"
This just freaking pisses me right off.

Classic "What the hell" costume. I still don't know, and I'm not sure he knows either.

I can see at least some work went into this. Evidently it is a '9'. I'd have thought maybe a Japanese cartoon thing.....!!???

Don't

This is another classic. Skier stuck in a power box? Nope, supossed to be a midget.

And finally, my favorite. The Jr. High girl who has it together in her head, but no one else really grasps it. Even when you ask her, she dives into a rant about a "gothic super hero woman who likes to read -slash- a Twilight character -slash- I wanted to die my hair purple....."

Whatever!

And then comes Daylight Saving Time. What is this?! Messing with my sleep! Don't get me wrong, Benajmin Franklin was a great guy, but I bet most of you haven't even thought about it really, just blindly changed the clocks like nothing was wrong and it was comepletely normal. YOU DON'T GET TO JUST CHANGE THE TIME!!! We aren't farming anymore. Yes, there are farmers, but they are smart enought to work it out. If you want more sunlight, go with the flow of the season and get up a little earlier or later. There is absolutely no need to be messing with let alone changing TIME. That is just like one day someone said, "Yeah, I don't really like Tuesdays, so 3 times a year we will just skip them." And somehow the whole world got involved and we all get screwed up in our tight schedules 2 times a year. Kinda like the whole February/"Leap" Year thing.....?! It's all a little suspicious to me.

3 people I'd rather DIE than be in an elevator with

I saw somewhere someone posted the top 5 people they'd like to be in an elevator with, and with me beign the pessimist I am, automatically thought of a few people I freaking can't stand. I had to share.

#1 Carrot Top

Do I even need to exaplin myself? Quite possibly the most nauseating, galling, grating person I've ever come across. Just the name Carrot Top is enough to throw by stomach acids over the edge. I just threw up in my mouth.

#2 Rosie O'Donell

This picture kind of sums up 2 people I can't tolerate. Anyway, she's not funny, she's not cute, she's manly, she's boisterous and innapropriate and I think she has stupid things to say and obnoxious opinions. I might try to hurt her in an elevator. I could take her. {Don't say 'comic relief' in the background and don't wear that jean jacket and hold it like that}.

#3 is a 3 way tie between Jerry Springer, Dan the Laptop Man, and The Osmond Family.

Jerry is obvious.

"Dan, the Laptop Man" seriously says some of the dumbest things I could even imagine saying. He's even got his freaking kids doing it. I aplaud the whole "entrepreneur" thing, but my hell. (EX: "PC Laptops makes me all warm and fuzzy") And it's not just that loathesome statement, he emphasizes awkward words and parts of words. (EX "PC Laptops, We love YOU") You have to hear him to get the full effect here. Kind of like saying 'You peed your pants' instead of "You peed your pants." Like it is normal to pee yourself, but you peed your pants?! You feel me? I may have lost a few of you there.

and lastly, the Osmonds. I hesitate to say this because my in-laws are big fans. They are all into watching Donny on Dancing With the Stars (which really, those last 7 words is enough for me to be turned off and tuned out and dry heave a little). I'm not really sure what is is about these people that bothers me so much. My mom has a strong influence on me about them growing up, but I am not sure she knows why there is such a huge disconnect there, either. They are CHEESE city to start with. I don't know even what to say, but I for sure don't want to see, talk to, or dance with any of them. It is annoying just solely how big that stupid picture is.

While posting, I decided I really don't want to be in an elevator with anyone. It's awkward because I feel like people are eyeing me thinking "She could use the exercise, why the hell didn't she take the stairs?" and so on. I also just don't want to fake smile to people, start dumb conversations, chat about 'what floor' you are going to, or really make any eye contact.

Why so much negativity you say? There are few I'd like to, or at least wouldn't mind, meeting in an elevator. Ashton Kutcher being one. When it really comes right down to it, I'd be uncomfortable because he is beautiful, so maybe not. But for sure the black Allstate insurance guy. (Is it bad to say 'black' right there?)

I serioulsy love him. I want him to read stories to me at night. I want him to rub my feet. I want him to talk to me about important life decisions, eat popcorn, and watch a movie on a snowy night. He is so calming and soothing, I just want to sigh, and, kind of, switch to Allstate insurance, really. This is really strange for me if you know me at all to be so intrigued a African American Insurance salesman.

Convicts and a large mango

So we went hunting this weekend with Benj's dad, brother and Tamie up in Logan canyon. It was super nice to get out and in the fresh air. The weather was beautiful, borderline hot, even. Didn't see a deer, or anything really. A huge abundance of chipmunks, freaky almost. It must be the 'year' of the chipmunks. So as I saw all the men dressed in orange, a thought came, which led the a few other random thoughts:

• Why do hunters and convicts dress the same? Does everyone realize they are carrying guns? Really, who are these people? A little fishy, is all I'm saying.
  
• I hate wearing socks, particularly long ones. Shuffle half way down to your ankle, have to pull them up every 3 minutes, which sucks when you are a prego biggie.


• It has been a long time since I've seen a falling star! Actually saw a few!


• I can't cook. Or even really take food out of bags and put it on a plate. Anxiety.


• I am deathly afraid of coyotes. I'm laying there in the tent, (which, I am usually a trailer girl) on the edge closest to the wall, listening to the howling of a coyote 'pack' and thinking "They will attack the outside of the tent first. Tamie is on the other side. I hope they go for her, because I am 'with child'......" and so on and so forth. In the middle of these thoughts, Benj leans over and says, "You know, they will attack the outside people first," and then giggles .... Puke.


• Really, I am quite afraid of being outdoors lately. I grew up camping and never really had an issue, but I was scared of every little sound, scared the fire was going cause a bigger fire and we wouldn't be able to get away, scared we'd run out of water, etc. I hate girls like that! I don't want to be her! Damn!


• And last, I can't even believe how freaking uncomfortable I am. I have a long way to go. Pregnancy is a really cool thing yet a really crappy thing. Heartburn, can't breathe, can't walk, back hurts, contacts don't work, feet swollen, fatty, etc. It is really cool to feel him move and know he is ok. It will all be worth it. Really, I will be 6 months Saturday, that isn't bad. Over half-way.

So this week, he is a pound and a 'large mango' and next week the length of a ear of corn. Supposed to gain 1/4 to 1/3 of a pound this week. Getting big!

Movement!

I've got definate movement for the first time tonight! Yeah! It's about time, I was starting to get worried. It almost, borderline, makes me nauseated. He's a spaghetti squash this week - hit the 1 pound mark!

He's getting his pancreas and teeth buds this week. That sounds really wierd.

In my browsing for baby stuff, I have found a few cute websites lately:

http://www.makeitandloveit.blogspot.com/

http://peanutposh.com/index.shtml

http://www.punkbabyclothes.net/

http://copplecarriers.com/

http://www.babysteals.com/ (good one, EM, you will like this)

Max the carrot

So I'm 21 weeks today, and Max is the length of a carrot (almost 11 inches). He was a banana last week and yesterday I looked on my counter and saw a banana, and gee, it must have been a oager banana or something but that thing looked huge! I guess he really is just getting big! It's been a while since I've posted, have had a rough week or two. To sum it up, baby is growing and looks great, no cleft lip, no club feet, no wierd brain tumor, just normal, swimmin around constantly moving! I know this not because I can feel him, but because I have a doppler at home and listen to him galivanting around all the time. Any time now though. It worries me slightly that I can't feel him, however, I am sure I will eat my words and wish he'd stop for five seconds once he starts. My placenta is in front + I am a biggie + a first timer, thus the wait.

I think lightbulbs are in the 'neutral' section of my mind. It's not solid though, I'm still thinking.

So, some advice (I need):

• Do you wait until later/after baby to decide what kind of binki he likes?


• Anyone have opinions about what the best bottles are (i'm not breastfeeding..)

Well, sorry i don't really have anything funny, witty, or even entertaining to say, so I will leave you with some words or genious from Jack Handy:

As the evening sky faded from a salmon color to a sort of flint gray, I thought back to the salmon I caught that morning, and how gray he was, and how I named him Flint.

To me, it's a good idea to always carry two sacks of something when you walk around. That way, if anybody says, "Hey, can you give me a hand?" you can say, "Sorry, got these sacks." {MY FAVORITE!!!}

We like to praise birds for flying. But how much of it is actually flying, and how much of it is just sort of coasting from the previous flap?

Petrified Wood

So I used to use 'petrified wood' as an example of something I felt 'neutral' about. I have now decided that I am no longer neutral toward it, I do not like it. I am currently searching for something to replace this for my example of neutralness. It is hard to think of something you feel neutral about, most things that come to mind right off the bat are things I don't like, then if I think harder, I think of things I like, but try thinking of something you don't really like or dislike, it's just there. Harder than you thought, eh?

Turnip/Large Bell Pepper

So I am 17 weeks and 6 days, this is the appx size of the little man.

Wierd. Who references 'turnips'?

Bell Pepper - 18 weeks

Turnip - 17 weeks (this particular picture is a 'healthy' size...)

Disclaimer: This is not the appx size of my freaking belly..! Looks more like a swallowed 4 turnips and a small cat whole!

Bubbling Pot

So i got this video to work, but not the Old Faithful one.

Enjoy the gurgling.

Yellowstone/Jackson Hole Trip

So we left last Friday with my parents and left for Ennis, MO. We drove thru Idaho Falls and Rexburg and got good shots of both temples. We stayed in a cute little cabin of our own, drove around looking for animals, laughed, and ate. We saw a ton ton ton of deer that first night, too many for it to even be cool anymore. We saw a few flocks of geese that were kinda cool, but it was too dark to get pics. AND I hate birds. We had our own little cabin and our own room and even our own bed! It was great, clean and very nice. (I expect nothing less from my mother.) So we went to Yellowstone Saturday and Sunday, drove our butts off looking for wildlife & gysers. It was a ton a driving, but a lot of fun. We actually saw more wildlife outside the park than we saw inside. We went to Jackson Hole, WY Sunday night and stayed in a cute little lodge overlooking the river. Trust my dad to always eat well on vacations, we had great food every meal! (Max says 'thanks papa'!) We listened to Jerry Seinfeld and Larry the Cable Guy and laughed and laughed. It was great.

Cute baby stuff from trip from Marnee and Papa!



Idaho Falls Temple

Falls

Rexburg Temple

Buck - Ennis, MO

Bald Eagle, Ennis, MO


Cool Rock Gyser thing, Yellowstone

Daddy Buffalo, slowly trucking down the road. Stopped to itch his leg. Look how dang close he was!! We could have touched him!

Hot Spring

Gyser

Good waterfall

Buffalo

Buffalo on side of road. They are so mellow it is funny. Problably aren't too funny when they are rawled up. In fact one of the handouts we got said people get 'gored' if they agrivate them too much. 'Gore' was a dramatic choice or word I thought, but hell, i guess it really is that bad.

In Yellowstone

Welcome to Yellowstone arch

Big Horn Sheep - not in the 'big horn' stage yet...

Our bedroom!

Our very own cabin in Ennis, MO!

Cool store in Ennis, MO

Earthquake Lake (caused by a big earthquake back in the day)

Elk Herd

Benj's favortie part of the trip! Look how close he got!

Madison River

Squirrell
Pretty Waterfall

Mommy Elk, really close (like this picture? courtesy of Benj no wanting to get out of the car. He could have RIDDEN the damn thing! but NO! No horns, not interested.)

2 Mama & baby elk

Gyser

Water/gyser thing

Gyser

Old Faithful Lodge - built in 1905 ish, still all original

Old Faithful Lodge

Paint Pots near Yellowstone lake

Unknown waterfall, pretty though

Sunset, Teton Mts

There is a daddy moose laying down, can you see it?!

Mama Moose Walking

Lodge in Jackson Hole

Lodge in Jackson Hole

view from our cute lodge in Jackson Hole

Marnee and Papa under the famous antler arch!

And the grand finale, the animal of them all!......

My swollen ankles and feet!!! This sums up how my preg body felt about walking with constant charlie horses! Sucked!!! They look like freaking walruses!

Well, I had a few more videos but I can't get them on here for some reason and the hubby isn't home, so this is all for now!

Thanks mom and dad for an awesome trip! Probably our last for a long long time!!