Max is 9 months!

Max was 9 months on October 22. His stats at his check up were this:

29 1/4 in long = 90%
22 lbs 8 oz = 97%
47 cm head circ = 97%

They are going off the preemie scale for him still, so that makes his precentages a little higher, but he is still a big boy!

He is playing peek-a-boo, patty cake, waving bye-bye, giving kisses, scooting on his bum, and walking all over if he is holding your hands. He wants nothing to do with crawling or being on his tummy. At all.

He still has reflux. We tried him off his meds for a week or so and back came the projectile spit ups. Dr Johnson says the 'vagus nerve' (gag reflex) doesn't form fully in preemies (or something) so it is common. Wierd to call him a preemie.

Also, since babies aren't raised on their tummies anymore, and for sure Max wasn't, it is normal for him to not be moving around as much. I was worried about this. He also said when they are big babies it is way harder for them to move thier weight around. I knew this and kind of thought of it as a fat joke, but really, it must be hard. It's hard for me to move myself around! Manda's baby Blake moves a lot more, but also is a lot lighter.

They pricked his toe for a hemoglobin and he didn't care. He looked at his toe, then looked at the nurse and smiled. The shots, however, he did not smile for.

catch up

I've got a few things:

1st: 2 new pet peeves added - see sidebar.

2nd: Upon reflection, ghosts are realy just dead people, right? Why the hell did someone think draping a sheet over a body would make them look like a ghost? No, it looks like a ghost with a sheet over them. I'm just sayin....

3rd: I've always been confused by the fact that Sewing Machines and Vacuums have been categorized together. Are they really that similar? I think it is freaking wierd. It borderline ticks me off. Then, I got thinking that those Flag-Map stores are awkward too.... they have nothing to do with each other directly either, and those stores definately piss me off. Why would anyone every want to go there? Get a map on your way out of town while you are getting gas and a drink. You don't need a flag. No one does. Then, a little closer to home, copies and party supplies (@ Pioneer Party)? And at one time there were also prescriptions there too. Did someone just think one day while making a copy, "Man, I wish they had a pinata here," or "It would be so convenient if I could pick up some valium when I pick up the kids birthday party balloons," (That one might be valid) But you get what I'm saying here? Crazy combinations.

pet peeve # 329

If there is no construction & no wreck - WHY ARE PEOPLE GOING SLOW????? It makes me so dang mad when I am sitting in traffic, thinking there better be some blood going on, life flight, something, and all of a sudden traffic is flowing and there was nothing. Why the hell did everyone slow down?? Ughhh!!!

tuesday night bath

I like this little guy

freaking funny

I came across this today and laughed out loud. He freaking HATES it!! Ha! You know when Elaine is yelling "Stella" on Seinfeld? That is what he looks like. Love it!

Thriller

I have had a lot of people tell me how they'd love to be a fly on the wall at one of my family gatherings. Well folks, here's your chance. Me, my mom, 2 sisters, neice and her friend, and nephew went to see Thriller tonight. It was awesome - makes me wish/want to dance again so bad! Anyway, we went last year also, hoping we will make a tradition of it. One of my sisters said something that I thought was funny, so I started listening just randomly to the things we were saying. For protection, I will leave them anonymous. Here are a few favorites:

"There is a fine line between acting like a zombie and acting like a handicap."

"I'm getting anxiety...."

"Owen, shut up!"

"Macie, shut up!"

"Are we supposed to feel bad for that shopping cart?"

"That clown looks like your boyfriend. Really."

"Don't"

"Flock of Seagulls!"

"That girl has such a nice body. Seriously, look at her abs. I can't even concentrate on anything else. Look at that. Wow."

3 minutes later: "No really, look at her abs."

"Now I'm getting pissed."

"Didn't you have a prom dress that looked llike that?"

"That is giving me anxiety."

"I think I feel like I am high."

"Don't"

"That guy in the dress reminds me of PeeWee Herman." (*this is my favorite)

"Macie, seriously, sit the hell down,"

"His head came off! Mom, his head is off and fwoating!"

"Don't"

"What the hell is that supposed to mean?"

"That was about 3 minutes too long."

"I am so distracted by that guys huge package."

"That might have gone too far right there. I feel dirty."

"Don't"

"Why are they wearing bloody church clothes?"

"Owen, shhhhhh! Really!"

"Don't"

"What the hell is mom laughing about? Seriously, it wasn't funny."

"OWEN: shut up!"

And might I add this: I've been a dancer. I understand the need for close fitting clothing. But there is NO NEED, I repeat, NO NEED for me to be seeing a guys whole package. Pork, beans, and all. It is very distracting. Cup? A size bigger pants? Something. I can't handle it. I it is not attractive, at all. In fact, look at this. They aren't dancers, but it gets my point across.

See what i'm saying??? Unacceptable.

my mr. blue eyes

awww

I am doing a private blog to just journal Max's life & milestones and came across this picture of him in the NICU. I don't know why, but I just love it. Looks like a little indian baby in a papoose :)

1992 called

Watching DWTS the other night, I got pissed off. After a minute, I realized why; this little peach and teal number. For the life of me, I cannot fathom, why - what would be going on in someones mind, in their life, that would make them think these two colors look good together. They didn't look good in 1992 and they still don't.

(How's this for creepy)

They remind me of enrichment night craft colors, 1992. Some kind of toll painted doll with straw hair + red dots on the cheeks for 'blush' - that kind of vibe, you know?

Man, I get worked up sometimes. I have anxiety now.

He thinks peek-a-boo is freaking FUNNY!!

LAZY new car!

We took the plunge and traded in the gas consuming truck. We were very sad to part with it. I think Benj felt like a little girl downgrading to a car, but he's better now. We got the 2010 Ponitac G6. It is pretty nice. Saves us on monthly payment & GAS, and doesn't save us on car insurance, contrary to what the damn finance man at the dealership told us. D-bag. Anyway, we are pretty happy about it (I'm not overly thrilled about the color silver, dark peweter/charocoal would have been my selection, but didn't have a choice...)

However,

This is how lazy I have gotten. In the truck, the music controls were on the steering wheel. New car, they are not. Now, I have to not only move my chubby little finger, but my whole fat flapping arm down to change the channel or adjust the volume. It's just too much. I was pissed for a few days and then I realized why, kind of smiled about how lazy people are, then now I am pissed again. I guess I'll just have to hook up the iPod, on a cord, so I can hold it in my limp stout hand and not move. Another thing that has been brought to my attention with this situation (which, by the way, who/what the hell is this 'Situation' person on DWTS?? Don't.), is that in our other car, that I am now driving, (which sucks also, that I am back to my post-high school car. The deal is, whoever drives farther to work gets the car with better MPG. B-i-n-g-o, Benj wins.), the seat belt buckle doesn't have a stopper thing on it so when not in use, it slides down to the bottom of the car halfway under your seat. Have you, my friend, ever been fat? It is hard enough squeezing yourself into a sedan, but to have to contort yourself and your huge arm down underneath the seat you are siting on....and then once/if you do get it hooked up, my large chest shuffles the harness all over so I try to stuff it under my boobs but I want to put in under my pit but know that isn't proper and I might as well take the whole damn thing off and then feel guilty. Screw it. I'm not wearing my seat belt in that car. It's just a large amount of hassle, that on some days, I am not willing to deal with. (I know my logical friends out there (Manda, Cher) will argue that 'How big of a hassle will it be when you die and Max doesn't have a mom?? Huh? How about that hassle???") And to you I say, we all know that I am only half serious most of the time. So take that.

With all of that being said, I'm considering this: http://www.svsurgical.com/

positions

I'm a snuggler. Benj was a snuggler when we were dating. Now, he thinks touching his pinkie toe to my ankle bone is sunggling. Even that almost sends him over the edge (These are the kinds of things we try to learn while we are dating, kids.....). Let's just go over a few of my favorites:

The classic bobsled hand hold. Both on our backs, holding hands. Simple. This is the most used in our house, since Benj, apparently, isn't real touch-ie.

The spoon. I always have to be the big spoon, which pisses me off when he calls me 'big', which causes me to feel big, which sends me into a pissed/sad mode, and just ends up not good. Why the hell can't Benj be the big spoon? Why??

And my favorite: The limp spoon. This is where somehow we get past the big spoon thing and are spooning (I am saying spoon a lot). Then, about 20 minutes into it, we are both almost asleep, and he turns to a 45 degree angle, toward me, so his back is now on top of my right arm. My left arm is still in the regular spooning position. Man, this is a comfortable one.

All of these are better when ambien is involved.